Archive for October, 2010

The PNCP is a fictitious political party in Ron's online storyworld

OK, so we’re all getting a bit fed up with this manure pile called the 2010 mid-term elections. It really doesn’t matter if you are an R, D, L, GDC, or FTP it still is a big PITA. It’s not even as civilized as he-said-she-said-it-said (*more on it-saids in a minute).

Has any single human being on planet earth heard any single candidate for American public office this year say, “I am, I will, I did” -??? Nope, I’ll bet not. Every single ad in my mailbox, every single pukeyvoiced telephone call in the middle of my freakin’ dinner or evening with my wife, every single mofo pop-up ad on the daggone news website is all about…

  • My opponent is an a-hole because he voted for…
  • My opponent is an a-hole because he voted against…
  • My opponent is an a-hole just because he is…

OK that’s just the candidate to candidate Bovine Scat. Then we’ve got the party-line…

(Did you ever think about the party-line metaphor and how true it is. A bunch of people blabbering at once and nobody is saying anything. — ah, but I digress, and very few people today are old enough to remember a telephone party line. They think a party line is something on a mirror.)

  • The opposing party wants to destroy (BLANK) in America because they’re not real Americans.
  • The opposing party supports (ANYTHING THAT YOU DON’T WANT) and…
  • The opposing party hates (EVERYTHING YOU VALUE IN LIFE)

*I promised more about the it-saids, and here it is. In their black-gowned, stern-faced wisdom the Supremes (NOT the Motown ones with Diana Ross and a couple of other hot chicks but the judge kind) – or should I say the Supreme Court Justices stated that corporations have the same right to participate in politics that human beings do. Yeah, you heard me right corporations–no souls, no hearts, and no friggin’ brains–with the same right to political contributions and discourse (kind of like intercourse, but not as fun) as human beings with blood and stuff. Maybe the Supremes (not the Motown ones) have WAYYYY to much experience with party lines themselves.

How many corporations do you think there are in this day and age whose stock is wholly owned by American citizens? Doh… How many even have the bulk of majority stockholders as American citizens? A simpler question is how many corporations (theoretically and supposedly American corporations) have the bulk of their capital in China and the bulk of their employees in India?

So, in a freakin’ nutshell millions of dollars from China, India, and maybe the Cayman Islands are being spent to put people on television to say “my opponent is an a-hole”?

The saying used to be that politicians are often “economical with the truth.” You know like ad agencies and the fine print in banking terms of service. Well, I’m pretty sure that the last honest words from an American politician were on the missing 18 minutes of the Nixon tapes.

Don’t forget to vote!


Q: What the heck does Apo-something mean, Hoarse Man?

A scene from The Down Button a Rick Lynxwood film starring Ron Lynch Chalice

HM: Apo-something means I just don’t know what yet! The easy way out would be Apocalypse…but it’s like way overdone. How many freakin’ movies can they make about it? So I started looking at alternatives. The internet is handy, but sometimes nothing beats a big fat hardcover Webster’s Dictionary. Take a look at the list below, and let me know what YOU think.

  • Apoapsis – Man, I’ve gotta say that certainly fits, same number of syllables, too. Sometimes I really feel like I’m a long way from my gravitational center. Out of the loop, almost.
  • Apocarpous – Sheesh! I don’t have any carpels, let alone separate ones. WTF is a carpel anyway? Sounds a little bit like the PITA tunnel I have in my wrist.
  • Apochromatic – First of all too many syllables. Not even going to waste time with that distorted image. (even a self-image)
  • Apocope – Wha…? Th… F…
  • Apocrine – we don’t do secretions here.
  • Apocrypha – Nope! I know who’s writing this crap. No doubtful authorship here. Hmmm… about that authenticity, though…
  • Skipping, skipping, skipping…a bunch of really boring ones.
  • Apologist – Like that ever happens, I should kick apology off the list, too.
  • Apomorphine – What d’ya think? Sounds a little hazy to me.
  • Aporia – This one has got to be getting close. The definition has a lot of big words in it, including literary
  • Apostasy – No, I’ve got no belief that this one is right.
  • Apostrophe – By Jove, I think this is it! I leave stuff out…and the stuff in here (the blog, not my head…ok, maybe in my head) is mine…mine…mine!
  • Apothecary – ask me tomorrow when I’ve taken my meds…
  • and last, but far from least…Apotheosis – thanks, you really shouldn’t, but hey if that’s what you think who am I to disagree?