Everyone in the known universe has created  decimam ad prima in descendenum ordo at least ONCE in their lives, probably more, maybe even more than TEN. Triggered by a notice about registration for the 2013 Pikes Peak Writers Contest, HoarseMan happily (OK, maybe not so much…) presents NEVER, EVER AGAIN – a treatise in top ten list format on why a writer, a serious writer, should NEVER, EVER go a full year (actually at least 18 months — Hoarseman’s last was RMFW on the 10th anniversary of 9/11) without a attending, presenting at, or organizing, a writer’s conference .

Here’s a sneak preview…

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Boy, the new 1200 x 600 header playground for Twitter accounts has been a blast to play with over the past week. I finished up the last of my accounts on Thursday night and have everything all installed. This is a reduced size copy of the @HoarseMan header. To see what all of the pictures are, just click on the image to see the full size annotated picture.

Half size image of HoarseMan Twitter Header – click to see the annotated full size version.

All eleven headers for the the ChaliceMedia Twitter Accounts will be up on the ChaliceMedia Blog and the ChaliceMedia Facebook page over next several days.  IMPORTANT! The ChaliceMedia Facebook page has been in a limited content R&D stage since I laid out the first version. It’s never been promoted so the only follower you’ll find there is HoarseMan. If the page has any interest for you, please click the like button and forward it to some friends. There will be much more coming up over the next few months.

Seeya,
Legenda verum est
Hoarseman

Categories from the mind of the HoarseMan… What do they really mean?

OK, so HoarseMan discovered that they were called “Topics” instead of Categories… No big deal. He’s pretty sure you’ll get the idea.

Abuckortwo

  • HoarseMan Meaning: Business, jobs, just making a living in general – potential snark alert.
  • RealMeaning: “You’re kidding me, right?”

Apilahooey

  • HoarseMan Meaning: This is – beyond the shadow of a doubt – stuff that HoarseMan has just made up. Did you know he has a website called “Ron’s Lies.”
  • Real Meaning: It’s true, sometimes the HoarseMan tells lies.

Apoapsis 1

  • HoarseMan Meaning: The Apoapsis: stuff gets written here when the HoarseMan is feeling way off center
  • Real Meaning: noun – (astronomy) the point in an orbit farthest from the body being orbited [ant: periapsis] WordNet® 3.0, © 2006 by Princeton University.

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…Doesn’t mean that nobody else was. In the past ten days since I read a Patheos article “3000 Years Ago, Was Anybody Alive Then?1 on people who really believe that the Olympics couldn’t be 3,000 years old because it is only 2012… (I read it with mouth hanging open, by the way) I’ve been searching for proper response.

Not that in NEEDS a response from MOI, but those who know me understand that it’s a very, very rare circumstance where I don’t feel compelled to offer forth some kind of response. This, I think, is definitely case where a couple of illustrations should do very well, thank you. I can assure you that even thought I, personally, was not alive — at least in this configuration — there were plenty of dudes and chicks hangin’.

It’s all about FOCUS… I repeat for those of you who know who you are… It’s all about FOCUS, not FOCUS INTERRUPTUM.

Exhibit 1: The Illustrated Vision of the Millennial’s “Worldly” View of Time.

Exhibit 1: Millennial timeline depicting FOCUS. If your eyes are already bad, you may be screwed at telling the difference.

Exhibit 2: The Illustrated View of the Boomer’s Weary Vision of Time

Exhibit 2: The Boomers’ timeline illustration their vision of FOCUS. IF EVERYTHING LOOKS OUT OF FOCUS TO YOU MOVE YOUR HEAD AROUND A LITTLE OR GO FIND YOUR GLASSES.

Non comede nivis flavum
Hoarseman
1 Please take time to visit the referenced article, it saves me from having to copy the entire freaking thing here in violation of the original author’s copyright.

The item below is a setlist. From the Corrupters 1982 tour of parts of the western United States. NO, Los Angeles, San Francisco, Seattle, etc. were not included destinations. However — Breckenridge, Estes Park, Alamosa, Laramie, Casper, Someplace-in-Nebraska that beings with an L (maybe named after a president) and has lot of of corn-fed college students around, and oh, yeah Denver and Boulder were among the debark-setup(ok we didn’t set up, our roadies Sam and Scotty did)-teardown-and-back-on-the-road destinations.

In addition to Laramie and Casper, we visited several other burgs further-up north where — how do they say it? “Where men are men and sheep are nervous!” But I digress. The image below refers specifically to three tour stops: Estes Park Colorado, Rifle Colorado, and Vernal Utah. Please note that the motel logo on the setlist is from where we STAYED, not where we PLAYED. The thing was basically set up for a year on the road, both one-nighters and week-long gigs. Estes Park and Vernal were each a week long, and Rifle was a one-night-stand. Estes Park was a week in Heaven – Vernal, a week someplace else… (sorry Utahans). Oh yeah, I think I already mentioned it, but in comparison Rifle was your typical middle-of-the-road one-night stand. Not Coyote ugly but not “let’s hop on a plane to Vegas and get married” either.

Vernal was the third leg of that particular trip. First stop was Estes Park – setup July 12, 1982 hit the road July 18. But there was a glitch.

I should tell you that for a while we’d been planning a new setlist that put a couple of our most tunes at the stroke of midnight. Living Disaster by Gary Myrick and the Figures, and Sympathy for the Devil by Messrs Jagger and Richard. Living Disaster and Sympathy back to back – what could be wrong with that? So, Wednesday night July 14, at the stroke of midnight we hit it. Got to the end of Disaster and nothing terrible had happened. Killed the night and went about musician stuff – getting into the rack about 4:00 – finally asleep about 5. Six AM. POUND, POUND, POUND on the door “Get out the dam broke! You have about ten minutes to get out of town.”  — I’ll leave the details for another story…

We hung around Estes for an extra few days (only because we couldn’t get out of town) and helped with the cleanup. We were able to leave just in time to make it to a recording session at Caribou Ranch (woot! Yet another story.)  Then the one-nighter in Rifle. Yes, Rifle Colorado. What better place for the Disaster/Sympathy set list?  The next day we were delayed in getting out of town because heavy rains had caused a mudslide on the highway. That’s TWO!

As we pulled into the venue in Vernal, a nice little Utah bar, and no that’s not an oxymoron. Across the road was a dam. A huge one. HUGE. It was getting dark so we couldn’t really see it, but from the sounds of the water it was a very big lake, BIG. While Sam and Scotty were setting up the gear we took a look at the setlists – outside on the porchy-thing where could hear the pounding waves. One of us, don’t remember who, picked up the Disaster/Sympathy setlist, wadded it up, and tossed it in the trash. The list below is what replaced it. No Disasters or Devils anywhere. When we finished playing about 2:00 AM, we got a non-refusable invitation for some skinny dipping in the lake across the highway.

No dam, just a lake. But I swear there are times when I can see the tall mass of concrete in my dreams — cracking.

modified Vernal Utah setlist 1982

musica potest, occidere potest vos

Hoarseman